Ode to My Life

all around me they look
like something is on my face
I push it aside
but nothing's really there

I don't fit in 
not with anyone
too nice  too mean  to fat  too smart  too dumb
when will it ever end

it's not me they see
it's not me that's there
I'm alone and afraid
that I will never be

I wake up with dread
another night of terror
another night where I don't fit in 
not with anyone

I look up in the sky
the colors astound me
how can so much beauty exist
love too

you don't know
no one ever will
why I can love so much
and yet not a single thing

it's too intense
I can't bare
the pain I cause
I'm the pain

the world is too beautiful
sometimes there's a mistake
and what has been done
never should have been

when a wrong is right
and the mistake is fixed
the pain that was caused
will cease to exist